You can massage your own prostate either internally, by inserting a finger into the rectum, or externally, by pressing on the perineum (the skin between the scrotum and anus). The prostate sits about 2 inches inside the rectum, toward the front of the body, and feels about the size of a walnut. Both approaches are straightforward once you understand the anatomy and basic preparation.
Preparation and Hygiene
Good preparation makes the experience more comfortable and reduces the risk of irritation or infection. Before you begin, have a bowel movement and urinate. Then clean your anal area gently with soap and water and wash your hands thoroughly.
Trim your fingernails short and file any rough edges smooth. Even a small snag can scratch the delicate rectal lining. For extra protection, wear a medical glove or place a condom over the finger you plan to use. Have a generous amount of lubricant on hand. Water-based lubricant is the safest choice if you’re using gloves or a condom, since oil-based products can degrade latex.
Finding the Prostate
The prostate is located on the front wall of the rectum, roughly two knuckles deep (about 2 inches in). It feels round and slightly soft or rubbery, similar to the tip of your nose. The tissue around it will feel smoother and firmer by comparison, so the gland itself stands out as a slight, fleshy bulge when you press toward your navel.
Not everyone locates it on the first try. Relaxation matters. If your pelvic floor muscles are tense, the rectum narrows and the gland is harder to reach. Slow, deep breathing and a comfortable position (lying on your side with knees drawn up, or squatting) both help.
Internal Massage Technique
Apply a generous amount of lubricant to your finger and spread more around the outside of your anus. Insert your finger slowly, pad facing forward (toward your belly). Push gently, pausing whenever you feel resistance, and let the muscles relax before going deeper. Rushing increases discomfort and tension.
Once you feel the walnut-sized bulge, use a gentle “come hither” motion, curling the pad of your finger against the gland and releasing. You can also try small circular motions or steady, light pressure on one side, then the other. The amount of pressure should be light to moderate. Think of it as the pressure you’d use to rub a tired eyelid, not kneading a muscle. Increase or decrease based on what feels comfortable. Some people feel a pleasant warmth or a sensation similar to needing to urinate. Both are normal.
Sessions typically last anywhere from a few minutes to around 10 or 15 minutes. There is no clinically established “ideal” frequency or duration. Start short and see how your body responds before extending the time.
External Stimulation Through the Perineum
If internal massage feels uncomfortable or unappealing, you can stimulate the prostate from the outside. The perineum, the firm patch of skin between the scrotum and the anus, sits directly beneath the prostate. Pressing upward on this area with two or three fingertips applies indirect pressure to the gland.
Use firm, rhythmic pressure or small circular motions. Because you’re working through layers of tissue, you’ll need somewhat more force than with internal massage, but it should never be painful. External stimulation is less direct, so the sensations are typically milder.
Using a Massage Device
Devices designed specifically for prostate massage are curved to reach the gland more easily than a finger can. If you choose to use one, the same preparation steps apply: clean the device, use plenty of lubricant, and insert it slowly. Look for a device with a flared base, which prevents it from traveling too far inside. Start with the smallest size available and avoid anything rigid until you’re familiar with the sensation. One pilot study on an at-home prostate massage device found that men with lower urinary tract symptoms reported some symptom relief, though researchers noted that optimal frequency and duration still need to be established.
What It Does (and Doesn’t) Do
Prostate massage is sometimes promoted as a treatment for chronic prostatitis, a condition involving long-term pelvic pain and urinary symptoms. The evidence for this is weak. A controlled study published in the journal Urology compared men with chronic prostatitis who received antibiotics plus prostate massage to men who received antibiotics alone. There was no significant difference in outcomes between the two groups.
That said, many people perform prostate massage for sexual pleasure rather than medical benefit, and the gland is densely packed with nerve endings that can produce intense sensation. Pleasure is a valid reason on its own and doesn’t require a medical justification.
When to Stop
Sharp pain, bleeding, or a sudden increase in discomfort are all signals to stop immediately. Mild pressure sensations and a feeling of needing to urinate are normal, but actual pain is not. If you notice blood in your urine or stool afterward, or if you develop fever or worsening pelvic pain in the hours following a session, get medical attention.
Avoid prostate massage entirely if you have an active prostate infection (acute prostatitis), which typically involves fever, chills, and severe pelvic pain. Massaging an acutely infected gland can push bacteria into the bloodstream. If you’ve been diagnosed with prostate cancer or suspect any abnormality, check with a urologist before trying massage on your own.